Thursday, August 4, 2016


It's been a year. Every time I tried to sit and put words to my heart's cry, my mind would fail.  I could not dialogue the secrets being written on my soul.  It will have to be a slow pouring over time.  The words will come and then I will share my lessons with you.

But for now, my heart in this moment...Obedience.

We are moving. Again.  How many times have I written about change?  I had grown accustomed to the cycle.  Learned to cope with the emotions.  But this time is different.  We've been here the longest.  This had become home. I had finally settled.  I learned to dig deeper, step out of my comfort zone farther and open up even more.

Back in February, our church was doing a series on Nehemiah that posed the question, "what was God building in you and using you to build?"  At the time, we had just received word that they were selling the radio station and Matt would be out of a job.  For me warning bells rang; no job meant moving for a new one.  Building.  I had been building.  I was leaning into what I thought God had for me and my walls crumpled with one conversation.

I have struggled with the process of answering these questions while Matt looked for work and we prepared our hearts for the coming change.  I have been hurt. I have been angry.  In one desperate prayer I cried out, "Don't You know what this does to me?  A part of me dies every time."  His reply stopped me, "I know.  It's supposed to."

Now to some that may sound harsh, but in that moment the truth of it actually soothed my soul.  The Holy Spirit began to pour scripture over me...

Luke 9:23 - And He was saying to them all, "If anyone wishes to come after Me, he must take up his cross daily and follow Me."

Galatians 2:20 - I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me: and the life which I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself up for me.

John 12:24 - Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.

I cannot become more like my Savior if I hold on to me, my dreams and wants.  Tightly gripped hands make it impossible to reach out.  I must die to myself. That's a hard pill to swallow.  Obedience isn't about feel good emotions.  Obedience is hard.  Obedience sometimes hurts.  But when it doesn't feel good, I know that God is good.  That's what we were created for; His will and purpose.  Does it make this move easier? Perhaps not, but it makes me cling to His promise that He will complete His good work in me.  My sanctification will continue and I can keep moving forward in joy.  

It can be the same for you.  Whatever journey the Lord has set before you, despite the struggle, can be one of victory through obedience.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Simply Tuesday

Have you read an Emily P. Freeman book?  If not, you Simply must.  I discovered Emily's blog & books a couple of years ago and found her words to be key in the soul journey Jesus has been leading me on.  When you read one of her books it's almost as if she is a dear friend sitting at your worn kitchen table sharing in mugs of hot coffee and scones.  You know the type; the kind that takes the words right out of your mouth and finishes your sentences.

I have had the disctinct pleasure this summer to pre-read her newest book, Simply Tuesday.  Once again her honest heartfelt words have hit home and become food for my journey.  In this fresh work of art Emily shares her lessons of learning to live Simply,  to embrace the small things in God's kingdom and to enjoy the ordinary life of Tuesday.

In her last book, A Million Littles Ways, I was challenged to see myself through God's eyes - as an artist.  I was encouraged to step out in faith and exercise the gifts I was given and to glorify God in the beauty I made.  I kid you not, I was pumped! I was ready to paint the world and shine brightly.  It was pivotal to the places God was placing me to serve and the direction I thought He was taking our journey.

The funny thing is, my journey didn't go big and turn down the path I was expecting.  Instead, the dreams and passions I wanted to live & breathe were placed on a back burner and Jesus opened a different door.  A door I didn't think I wanted to open.  A plain looking door.  Emily's encouragement humbly exposed my bruised pride and drew me to sit on her bench to breath in the beauty of God's Simple plan for this season in my life.

I invite you sit on the bench.  Take the time to read Simply Tuesday.  Close your eyes and ears to the chaos of today and let her words of truth resound in your soul.

Discover Emily at and preorder her book at